Annoying

I think more things become annoying as we grow older. If I listed everything that annoys me these days, you’d think I'm a cantankerous old curmudgeon. I don’t typically complain about all my aggravations, though. I mean, what good would it do? Some people actually think I’m uncommonly tolerant, but in my case, it’s more a matter of resignation.

With the midterm elections looming, you might think political lunacy would be at the top of my list of irritations. Oh, I might reflexively blurt out a sarcastic remark now and then, but as the candidates politick their way to election, the rhetoric becomes more confounding than perturbing. Make no mistake, I could compile a long list of political irritations, but that would no doubt annoy most of you.

Most annoyances come from everyday life. Now, you might be surprised to discover that people are not the primary source of most of my vexation. Have you ever used the phrase, “you’ve got to be kidding me”? I say it when I’ve had a particularly frustrating day, when serial annoyances lead to exasperation.

I expect things to work, and I can get quite cross when they don’t. It’s often very simple things that build up over the day. Trying to open a package with instructions that don’t work. Discovering there’s no milk after you’ve filled your bowl with cereal and sliced a banana on top of it. Getting into your car to find you forgot to grab the keys on your way out. Being notified that your printer is out of ink in the middle of a print job. Hitting your head on the corner of the stove hood while you’re cooking. Discovering that the pool water has turned green overnight. The list could go on and on.

I recently decided to review and revise one of my early novels to improve the grammar, punctuation, and readability. I used a software tool to help with the task. The tedious process took a week. When I began double-checking the work, I discovered that many of my changes hadn't been saved by "auto save". This goes beyond annoyance and into infuriation. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” I moan. (To be truthful, I may have inserted an expletive or two.)

Of course, people are annoying. You can’t really avoid being irritable with  people, including AI 'people'. I don't think of myself as particularly crotchety, but there are occasions when it doesn’t take much to provoke me.

There are two kinds of annoying people: those who are deliberate (there's a special word for those people), and those who don't have a clue. The world is full of the first type - rude, selfish, oafish people. Plenty of the second type, too. I find it annoying when people, usually young, professional women, don't pronounce the "T" in words like button and important.

Life is full of irritating encounters. Driving, shopping, dining out, bureaucrats, children (or people who act like children), loud TV commercials, and automated customer support systems are teeming with potential to provoke our ire.

When you get older, I guess damn near everything can be annoying. Why can’t everybody be more like you and me? Wouldn’t the world be a better place? I say that to people all the time. They always agree, of course, then they say or do something that irritates me. Don’t get me wrong. I know that I’m annoying, too. Just ask my wife.

I suppose many of the things that annoy us are petty. We live in a house with high ceilings, which create echoes when we try to talk to each other. I’m in the kitchen preparing supper. Paula is in the living room watching the News. I cannot find the colander. It’s not where it is supposed to be.

“Where did you put the colander?”

“What?”

“Colander. Where is it?”

“Calendar?”

“What?”

“Just use your phone.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I can’t understand what you’re saying. The TV is too loud.”

“Maybe you should turn it down.”

Now, we’re both annoyed and need a glass of wine to calm our agitation. I discover that we are out of wine. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” we both say.